Sunday, October 21, 2012

Low GI Recipe - Sparking Triple-Berry Punch

So a drink this time, just for something different.  I haven't tried it yet, but it is on my menu for Christmas Day.

From Australian Better Homes and Gardens, Diabetic Living Magazine, November/Dec 2012

Now the recipe doesn't have any nutritional or GI info, but I am hoping, given it is in their magazine it is at least no more than medium GI.

Sparkling Triple-Berry Punch, Serves 6

1.5L light cranberry juice, chilled

Juice of 1/2 lemon

1.25L diet dry ginger ale, chilled

750ml Yellowglen Jewel Pink, chilled

250gm strawberries, hulled, chopped

120g (1 cup) frozen raspberries

1/4 cup small mint leaves

Ice cubes, to serve

Extra mint, to serve

1. Put juices, ginger ale, wine, berries, mint and ice in a large jug. Stir well. Top with extra mint to serve.

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Entry Number 27 - See the Person, Not the Disease

So I've been thinking a lot about my reaction to Wednesday's visit to the Prof, my diabetes specialist, and I've realised that what pissed me off the most is that I felt he only sees the disease not me, well not the real me.

He is good at what he does, one of the best in Perth in fact, and he has years and years of experience.  But does he see me or only what he wants for me?

I know he wants me to be a controlled diabetic.

I know that he knows that losing weight will help.

I know that he has my best interests at heart.

But I don't know if he sees me, the square peg that very rarely fits into the round hole of anything.

I have 3 types of arthritis and none responded to the medication like they should, in fact I could say that the medications made no difference at all.

I have type 2 Diabetes, and a Low GI food diet, medication and even exercise (when I was at the pool) made only a slight bit of difference in the long run.  Even losing 12 kgs didn't bring my blood sugars down to even close to normal, in honesty if made a slight difference for a short period of time.

So while it is good to have all the medical knowledge in the world, if you don't see the person, if you don't listen to the person, can you cure the person?

Now I am not saying that I am a perfect person, doing all the right things all the time, hell no.  I am the first to admit that I break the rules all the time, especially when I am stressed - which lately is all the time.  But I am trying the hardest I can to do the right thing, but when it comes down to it I am human and I am me and maybe, just maybe you need to think outside the box of this disease to help me.

Is that asking too much?

Friday, October 19, 2012

Entry Number 26 - Trying to Find The Bright Side

Last night as I sat and thought about giving myself my Insulin injection, I took the time to reflect on the positives.

1. Only 1 needle per day (at this point anyway).

2. The insulin can be injected at room temperature, so less likely to sting

3. I only have to give it to myself at bedtime (at this point anyway), which means I can now think about going out for breakfast or dinner without carrying it with me.

4. If I do have to start giving it to myself more often, I don't have to carry the cooler bag with me, so it is more discrete.

5. I don't have to rush home to make sure I have enough time before my evening meal to give myself an injection.

It is still stressing me about the weight gain that is inevitable, but at least there is a slight new spin happening in my head, which is good.

So I won't put up a dark moon today, nor a bright orange one, in fact I will leave it blank, and take the pressure off there as well.

Thanks for popping by xxx

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Entry Number 25 - The Insulin Regime Starts Tonight

So putting a half glass full on the whole going onto Insulin, at least I now no longer have to do 2 injections a day plus the evening Insulin as I am off the Byetta as it did nothing for me - no weight loss and only marginal dropping of my BGLs at the beginning.

So before retiring to the Land of Nod tonight I will start my Lantis Insulin injection at 10ml, then I need to check my BGL in the morning prior to breakfast, after 4 nights of 10 ml (and the subsequent morning checks), if it is not going down, I need to increase to 12, then 14, then 16, then 20, then 24, then 28 etc until I start to get some results.

So the waiting (no pun intended and of course it would be spelt differently) game begins.  Will this work?  One can only hope.

When I saw John (my pysch) on Monday I told him I was struggling with feeling broken and fragmented, I feel like I no longer have the ability to see the glass as half full.  He found one for me though, many years ago there would not have been medication for Diabetes - so true.

Still this feeling of being fragmented is a worry.  I am so scared that if I let one little shard go I will fracture into a million pieces.

I am sure that attending counselling will help in the long run, but right about now it feels like I have just lifted the corner of Pandora's Box and all that is within will coming bursting out at a rate that is too fast for me to cope with.

Suppression may lead to depression, but I'm sort of scared that non suppression will lead to insanity!

I'd like to welcome my 2 new followers, Wanderlust and Melissa, 2 wonderful cyber friends who along with The Elephant's Child send me so much love that it brings tears to my eyes - thanks ladies.  And of course there is my Mum (Mimsie) who has always been there for me.

Today I had my injections into my back, hopefully they will bring me some relief and I can get back to the pool and walking.  I expect though that the cortisone will increase my readings for a few days as well.

Tonight we had the lovely Low GI Chicken Curry from this post - it really is delicious.

Thanks for popping by and sharing you love and support, I am really trying to get the golden moon back here again xxx

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Entry Number 24 - What's The Point?

I will forewarn you, this will be a Dark Side of the Moon post, it will also be somewhat painful to write.  I know it will be teary post, because my eyes are already brimming with tears.

What's The Point - of trying to eat well, of giving up Coke, of injecting myself twice daily?  Nothing it seems as my readings are going sky high again and now I will be on insulin.

What's The Point - of even trying at all, when this disease chews you up and spits you out like a piece of discarded waste?

What's The Point, well the point is I am trying to live without my feet being amputated, without going blind, without getting sicker and sicker.

But, shit, I am trying and it is not working.

I am still classed as uncontrolled, and too right I am, I am uncontrolled with frustration and anger.  I am really to smash something, but What's The Point?  It changes nothing.

My weight is already heading back up because I am off the arthritis medication that gave me constant diarrhoea, nearly 5kgs in 3 months, and I am trying to eat less and eat well, What's The Point ... it makes no difference at all.

So now, it is recommended I have a gastric sleeve operation, permanent surgery to reduce the amount I am eating, because NO ONE IN THE MEDICAL PROFESSION BELIEVES ME!!

They all think I overeat, it's bloody obvious, they do that smile when I try and tell them, you know the one, the right She's Kidding Herself smile.

And just to sweeten the deal for me, now I am on insulin and that makes you put on weight.  BLOODY WIN WIN SITUATION THIS ISN'T.

But somehow I am supposed to smile and get on with my life.

So here is the Dark Moon, and it is likely it will be here for a while now.

And a side note to my Mum, please don't call me to talk about this, if and when I want to talk I will bring it up, I just need some time to sit with this.  Your support is always appreciated, and I love that you are there for me, but I need time to process this, please.